World Fantasy Convention 2011... and lions and tigers and... oh crap

Next week is the World Fantasy Convention in San Diego. I've been planning to go for several months, and when I originally registered for the convention in March, I was just a fan, with no fantasy publications to my name. Since then, my novella The Devil's Garden was released in June, and my House of Arkhangel'sk series sold to Entangled Publishing, with the first book, The Fallen Queen, due out in December. So I'm sort of an author. I hear that in Bender's voice from The Breakfast Club, a la the following exchange:

Claire Standish: You know why guys like you knock everything? John Bender: Oh, this should be stunning. Claire Standish: It's because you're afraid. John Bender: Oh God, you richies are so smart, that's exactly why I'm not heavy into activities. Claire Standish: You're a big coward. Brian Johnson: I'm in the math club. Claire Standish: See, you're afraid that they won't take you, you don't belong, so you have to just dump all over it. John Bender: Well, it wouldn't have anything to do with you activities people being assholes, now would it? Claire Standish: Well, you wouldn't know, you don't even know any of us. John Bender: Well, I don't know any lepers, but I'm not going to run out and join one of their fucking clubs. Andrew Clark: Hey. Let's watch the mouth, huh? Brian Johnson: I'm in the physics club too. John Bender: Excuse me a sec. What are you babbling about? Brian Johnson: Well, what I had said was I'm in the math club, uh, the Latin, and the physics club... physics club. John Bender: Hey, Cherry. Do you belong to the physics club? Claire Standish: That's an academic club. John Bender: So? Claire Standish: So academic clubs aren't the same as other kinds of clubs. John Bender: Ah... but to dorks like him, they are. What do you guys do in your club? Brian Johnson: Well, in physics we... we talk about physics, properties of physics. John Bender: So it's sorta social, demented and sad, but social.

That's what I mean when I say "sort of an author"... not that my writing ability is in any way demented and sad, but that I'm kind of a dork on the outskirts of things, and I'm not really sure I'm fully entitled to the social club status that someone like Claire has, but, hey, I'm happy with who I am. (And might I add, yes, I was in the physics club in high school.)

So everyone who registers for WFC as an author gets this questionnaire asking if they want to be on a panel. Naturally, I said no. (I might have said, "HELL, no.") Then my lovely publicist, Cathy Yardley Wilson, encouraged me to sign up for panels. Knees knocking, I crawled back to the events coordinator at WFC (yes, I can crawl on knocking knees; I'm talented that way) and said, "um, yeah, so about that HELL, no...." I turned in my questionnaire, figuring it was too late by that point and I'd be safe.

Today, the program was posted on the WFC website, and I saw this:

FRIDAY EVENTS

1:00 PM

Pacific 2/3: The Crystal Ceiling

Is there still a distinction between “women’s” and “men’s” fantasy and horror? Despite the power and importance of women fantasy and horror writers is much of the male community still dismissive of most female authors’ work? What about the number of female characters/protagonists? Do we see more of them lately in fiction written by men as well as women?

Kate Elliott, Charlaine Harris, Nancy Kilpatrick (M), Jane Kindred, Malinda Lo

Say what? Somebody accidentally put my name in there. Dammit, who's this other fantasy author with my name?

Oh, crap. I think that's me. Next to a bunch of real writers. I wonder if it would seem odd if I was really drunk at one o'clock in the afternoon?

Claire Standish: You know why guys like you knock everything? John Bender: Oh, this should be stunning. Claire Standish: It's because you're afraid. John Bender: Oh God, you richies are so smart, that's exactly why I'm not heavy into activities. Claire Standish: You're a big coward. Brian Johnson: I'm in the math club. Claire Standish: See, you're afraid that they won't take you, you don't belong, so you have to just dump all over it. John Bender: Well, it wouldn't have anything to do with you activities people being assholes, now would it? Claire Standish: Well, you wouldn't know, you don't even know any of us. John Bender: Well, I don't know any lepers, but I'm not going to run out and join one of their fucking clubs. Andrew Clark: Hey. Let's watch the mouth, huh? Brian Johnson: I'm in the physics club too. John Bender: Excuse me a sec. What are you babbling about? Brian Johnson: Well, what I had said was I'm in the math club, uh, the Latin, and the physics club... physics club. John Bender: Hey, Cherry. Do you belong to the physics club? Claire Standish: That's an academic club. John Bender: So? Claire Standish: So academic clubs aren't the same as other kinds of clubs. John Bender: Ah... but to dorks like him, they are. What do you guys do in your club? Brian Johnson: Well, in physics we... we talk about physics, properties of physics. John Bender: So it's sorta social, demented and sad, but social. Right?

Fantasy week at Carina Press

In addition to my debut release of The Devil's Garden, fellow fantasy author David Bridger also has a new release today as part of Carina's Fantasy Week. I haven't had a chance to read it yet, but like all of his books, it sounds terrific: English carpenter Joe Walker thinks his life is over when he discovers his wife and best friend having an affair. Restoring an abandoned theatre offers little hope for a fresh start...until he follows a group of strangers through a hidden door into a world he never could have imagined.

In the haven known as Quarter Square, Joe encounters a community of supernatural street performers who straddle the mortal world and the magic realm known as the Wild. Here, Joe finds a sense of belonging he's never known before—and a chance to uncover the truth behind the frightening visions that have haunted him since childhood. He also meets Min, an enchanting singer who quickly captures his heart.

But as Joe settles into Quarter Square, he learns their haven is under attack, while an ancient enemy threatens to tear him and Min apart. Now, Joe must learn to wield his own powers in order to save the life he's come to love...

Quarter Square is available now at Carina Press. Get it while it's hot!

While you're over at Carina, check out these other Fantasy Week releases:

Last Car to Annwyn Station by Michael Merriam

Cat's Tale: A Fairy Tale Retold by Bettie Sharpe

Friday flesh: Also fantasy

Just because...

Yeah, baby...Thor.

There was not enough of this in this movie and there is not enough of it on the Internet:

And Sif's wearing way too many clothes, but still hot:

And there was a distinct lack of this:

Now for some random hotness:

Flesh for fantasy

Lately I've been wondering how much boffing is too much boffing for traditional fantasy. Because right now my WIP seems to need a cold shower.

I've always had a bit here and a bit there in everything I write, but really, I'm not writing erotic fantasy.  I may even have erred on the side of caution in some of my books for fear of bringing too much sparkly-girldom into my fantasy, because heaven forfend my future fans upset the status quo at sf/f cons by having, you know, vaginas.

And yet even as romantic vampires are supposedly ruining conventions all across America, we have columnists like Ginia Bellafante in her recent review of HBO's Game of Thrones telling  us no self-respecting woman could possibly enjoy traditional fantasy, and that if we like it it's because it's been "sexed up" and we ren-faire losers are too stupid to notice we're being fed pablum to keep the boys happy.

Meanwhile, self-hating-woman columnist Liz-something of the Daily Mail tells all of us stupid boorish sex-positive feminists that women pretty much hate sex and only do it to get a man to take care of us. So really, HBO can't possibly be engaged in imaginary sexing-up of George R.R. Martin's writing to get women to watch, cuz we're all frigid. (Welcome to somewhere in an orange and avocado polyester jumpsuit in 1972, and grab yourself a valium and a vodka tonic because the last 40 years were all in your head.)

It all has me a little confused. Do I dance around the sex to avoid being accused of (gasp!) writing for women readers or do I sex it up for the hordes of Lifetime watchers I might be able to lure into the genre?

The problem is, I keep doing this silly little thing where I write what I enjoy reading. And right now in The Palace of Wisdom, all of my characters are going at it like they're at a South of Market sex club in San Francisco on a Saturday night.

But maybe it's okay, because Jacqueline Carey has a fabulous anal scene in Kushiel's Justice. Whether it's because women writers and readers are tarnishing fantasy's good name or not, it looks like the sex kitten is out of the bag.

And now as bonus post-script eye candy, and apropos of nothing, Maroon 5's Adam Levine seems to have a little something Belphagorian going on:

Thanks to the lovely ladies at Cup o' Porn for turning me on to this yumminess. ;)